Thursday, 28 May 2015

An Opportunist's Question and A Determination to Reach Perfection

I don't have much time to be writing this as I am feeling very very guilty that I am leaving the house in such a mess to catch up with my commitments and this is the only couple hours I got to try and get it in some kind of proper shape. However I decided I just had to unload my thoughts so here they are (random thoughts mind you):

I was at a dinner Monday last week, which I very much enjoyed for the food was better than delicious (and that's not something I say often of food other than what my husband cooks) and the company was even better. And for once I had something going in my life worth talking about and which people were interested in hearing, namely - my freelance writing. One person at the table, who I would easily have classified under the 'opportunist' trait even before his comment of that day, was quick to ask is it making me any money. He seemed to realise he'd made a faux pas and quickly told me he understands it's not about the money but might as well be getting something out of the effort. Well true, I must agree with him that given the long hours I put into the writing/research/even admin work at this point that goes into keeping my new career going, it would be sad to be doing it all for 'nothing'. But it wouldn't be nothing would it? Because writing is something you have to be passionate about if you want to be writing anything worth reading at all. I do get paid for my work, yes, obviously outside of this blog which is just my 'thing' and pays itself in that it is advertising my works and getting more people to know me. However it is comments from readers that give me more joy than the paycheque - I think it's marvellous to be receiving comments and private messages even as far as from New Zealand, or in a particular case even from someone relatively famous!

I am an advocate for "I do what I love so I love what I do", which was a phrase that fascinated me ever since I was young and still watching Mary Poppins. Another similar saying is that if you do work you love then you won't have to work a day in your life. I also remember a university lecturer once said that a 'job' comes from the word 'gobbo' in Italian, which means 'hunchback' and so refers to literal and figurative 'back-breaking' work. Meanwhile, he said, if we strove for knowledge and a degree (which I opted out of and don't really regret that much) then we'd be free to do whatever 'work' and not 'job' we wanted, far from anything that breaks our spirit. Unfortunately whilst I agree with all the three instances mentioned in this paragraph, I also believe in the reality that it is not always possible to do whatever you want in life. The bills must be paid, as does the home loan, whilst food isn't exactly cheap and however much you try to stop yourself from buying new clothes to avoid the cost, children do grow up fast and need constant new updates to their wardrobe. What I'm trying to say is, life is not exactly a fairytale and unfortunately I do not believe that it is always possible to just do what you love and leave the rest. As I mention in my profile on here, I would love to live in Central London but it doesn't mean I do! Same goes for making a living out of writing - unfortunately an office job can pay the bills much better than freelancing in this small country ever will. So the most I can do is strive for perfection in any imperfect situation, aiming not only to be the best I can be at whatever I do have to do, but even always striving to find that perfect state/place that interests me, cajoles me into aiming always higher and for the best, a place to call not only my workplace but also a friendly second home. Whilst still keeping writing - which is not a 'job' but a 'joy' - in my life too and giving it the importance it deserves. :-)

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